She's one of the most beautiful, talented, charismatic women that I know... but you wouldn't know it by her Facebook page.
Her Facebook status updates constantly seem to question her very worth. Things like, "I'm the least exciting person I know," and "Why doesn't anybody trust me?" permeate her page. They're said with a smile -- well, at least a :) -- and are always refuted by her legion of Facebook friends.
At first, I was always quick to chime in my two cents as well, reminding her of all the wonderful people, things and personal attributes for which she has to be thankful.
Then I stopped, for a couple of reasons.
First, if she really does believe these things, then a simple reassurance on a social networking site won't be enough to change her mind. And if she's just saying them as a ploy for public adoration, then I don't really want to be a part of the ego-feeding.
I read a news story the other day about how few people actually use their cell phones and smartphones to make calls; we've become a culture that keeps in touch via text messages and tries to connect on the web. But stuff like this remind me that you can't judge a person by her Facebook status; you can't evaluate situations based on a Tweet. It's obvious I need to reconnect with this old friend, find out what's really eating her. We're not close these days -- I haven't seen her since moving to our current home more than five years ago -- for me to know if this is a cry for help or a cry for attention.
The winner of the 100 design-them-yourself stickers from Next Day Flyers is...
Congrats! Please email me by Wednesday, November 30th to claim your prize.
I have a confession to make.
DH is a better husband than I am a wife.
I don't like to admit it, especially not out loud, but it's true.
DH is patient; he can listen to me drone on and on and on about the hemorrhoids that just haven't gone away since Baby C's birth and not even bat an eye. He's compassionate; he engages me in conversation about said hemorrhoids, nodding his head with sympathy and offering constructive advice when appropriate. And he's engaged; he's even offered to make a run to the drug store to buy me more Tucks pads.
But it doesn't stop there, although I wish it did.
My husband cooks all the meals in our house; yup, every last one. He often jokes that if cooking were left up to me, our family would subsist on simple pasta, pierogies and sandwiches. Instead, he delights our taste buds with teriyaki ginger pork tenderloin, chicken & dumplings and several varieties of the heartiest chili.
He does his own laundry too, and sometimes, he'll throw a load of my clothes in the wash with his. He's only destroyed one of my shirts in the past year -- a nautical-themed striped shirt I got at Banana Republic, back when I could afford to shop there -- when one of Baby C's red onesies accidentally got into the washing machine. He folds his laundry, too.
He changes diapers without complaint.
He spontaneously rubs my shoulders while I'm working on the computer.
He vacuums.
All of these wonderful personality traits and helpful chores make him pretty ideal... and therein lies the problem.
Because when your husband seems -- by all outward appearances -- to be fairly perfect, your friends don't let you complain about him. Instead, they try to defend him. For example, when I recently told my girlfriend about DH's penchant for completely messing up the kitchen while cooking, she retorted, "Yeah, but at least he cooks. My husband never..."
I guess beggars can't be choosers, but...
No husband can be perfect, can he?
Geez, I hope not.
Even though I've pledged not to put up my holiday decorations or start listening to Christmas tunes on the radio until after Thanksgiving, that doesn't mean I can't be a good little elf and prepare for the holiday season now. After all, more preparation in November means a more laid back December... and a happier mommy!
That's why I'm so excited about the prize I'm giving away today: 100 stickers from Next Day Flyers. You can use the stickers -- which measure 2 x 3.5 inches -- for just about anything, but I've decided to use them as gift tags.
I created my stickers using the site's Online Design tool; it was really easy, and really fun -- I love letting my creative side (what little there is of it) show. My design resembles Santa's belt, which will be perfect for the holidays. I had a little trouble understanding some of the sticker printing terminology on the site, but thanks to Next Day Flyers' "Live Chat" feature, I was able to solve them quickly with the help of a customer service representative. The stickers just arrived yesterday, and look as charming in person as they did on my proof.
ONE of my lucky readers will win:
100 2 x 3.5 inch stickers with 2-4 business day shipping-
a $35.95 value!
HOW TO ENTER:
This giveaway is only open to individuals who follow this blog on Google Friend Connect. To enter, just leave a comment telling me how you'd use the stickers if you won.
THE FINE PRINT:
One entry per person -- multiple entries and entries from individuals who do not follow this blog on Google Friend Connect will be deleted. This giveaway is open only to U.S. residents. The giveaway is open through Sunday, November 27th. One winner will be selected using a random number generator.
GOOD LUCK!
FCC DISCLAIMER: I was provided with 100 free stickers from Next Day Flyers for the purpose of this review. No other compensation was provided. The opinions expressed in this review are my own, and were not influenced by the sponsor company.
Baby C celebrated his half-birthday earlier this month, and the milestone got me thinking about the differences in my life during his first six months compared to G's first six month. For example...
With G, I was telling people I "just" had a baby, even when G was 18 months old. With G, people have to remind ME I had a baby somewhat recently.
With G, I never washed her tiny little onesies in anything but Dreft. This time, Baby C is lucky if I even REMEMBER to put detergent in the washer.
With G, I was always careful to use the padded little grocery-cart-germ-protector thingy. This time, I just hope Baby C won't try to eat the cart while I make my mad dash through the supermarket aisles.
With G, naptime and bedtime were sacred, something not to be tampered with under any circumstances. With Baby C, I push his bedtime back by more than an hour every Wednesday night so I can selfishly attend my favorite yoga class at the Y.
With G, I took about a thousand pictures a month -- often ten shots of her in a single position with only slight differences in her appearance; I saved every last one. With Baby C, I've taken maybe a few hundred pictures since he came from the hospital.
With G, I bought every piece of clothing she wore -- new, of course -- and meticulously planned her adorable little outfits. This time, Baby C gets his clothes as hand-me-downs or consignment sale finds; he's lucky if they match.
With G, I felt like she was so grown up and accomplished when she learned to roll over, sit up, crawl. This time, I feel like Baby C is still so small, so young; maybe it's because I know how much more growing he has to do, whereas with G, everything was a new experience and I really didn't know what would come next.
With G, I felt unsure of myself and my abilities to be an adequate role model and mother. With Baby C, I am confident that I am fulfilling my motherly duties, even if that means the house doesn't get cleaned more than once a month and I consider Chef Boyardee to be a culinary genius.
Miss C, one of the three winners of my Shutterfly holiday card giveaway didn't respond by my Wednesday deadline to claim her prize, so I am going to pass it along to another one of the entries. Random.org has decided that...
Once again, you have three days (til Sunday) to contact me to claim your prize, otherwise yet another one of you will have a chance at it... again!
I've been working on a skill I think all women need to have in their arsenal. It isn't how to cook the perfect Thanksgiving turkey, or throw the ultimate 3rd birthday party for your son, or clean the house so well it doesn't look like anyone lives there.
It's learning how to say no.
This has been a tough skill for me, particularly since I left my formal job over a year ago. When I left the 9-5 rat race, I assumed I'd gained 40 free hours in my week, and tried to find worthwhile outlets for those 40 hours.
I became the secretary for my local swim club.
I joined the board of directors for our local chapter of the Ronald McDonald House.
I was voted into the position of president of our homeowners' association.
I signed up to be the room mom at G's preschool.
But the great misnomer about being a stay-at-home -- or in my case, a work-at-home -- mom is that you have great gobs of time on your hands to do anything and everything. A woman who is at home during the day is expected to cook, clean, tend to the children, and on some days, meet her husband by the door after a long day's work holding a beer and his slippers and wearing nothing but a frilly apron.
I quickly learned that leaving my 40-hour-a-week job had not netted me 40 hours of free time. In fact, between caring for my children (which, I'm pretty sure, is a 180-hour-a-week job) and my home, taking on additional freelance work, and occasionally talking to my husband, mother and other family and friends, I quickly realized that I probably had more time -- or at least, better-structured time -- when I was working full-time.
It took me a year, but I finally realized I would have to shed some of the responsibilities I'd naively taken on in the weeks and months after I left my career.
I didn't want to stop volunteering at G's school; I felt it was an important way of showing -- rather than telling -- her that her education matters. Likewise, I didn't want to drop the commitment I'd made to the Ronald McDonald House, as I also felt it was important to show my kids that every person needs to help out in their community.
I literally couldn't afford to cut back on my freelance job -- it helps pay the bills -- nor could I resign as secretary of our pool; that position helps to subsidize our annual membership, which is a luxury I wouldn't want to live without (it might be one of the few luxuries we allow ourselves these days).
Ultimately, I decided to resign as president of our HOA. I chose this option for a variety of reasons, such as my hatred of confrontation and my innate belief that it should not be up to the HOA president -- or any HOA board members, for that matter -- to police the neighborhood like the Libyan police under Gaddafi.
I tendered my resignation last night and it felt gooooooood.
So now I have given myself back an hour or two every week; not much, but enough to make a difference in my life. Of course, I'll probably use that time to catch up on all the episodes of "Glee" and "Modern Family" I've missed this fall, but you know what? It's my time, and -- I've finally learned -- I can do with it what I want!
The winners of the 25 free holiday photo cards from Shutterfly are...
#9 Miss C
#6 The Riggs Family from 'Growing Up Riggs'
Congrats to all of you! Please email me no later than Wednesday, November 9th to claim your prize. If I fail to hear from one of you by the end of Wednesday, I will draw another winner!
Going into the weekend, I've got just seven entries for the 25 free holiday photo cards from Shutterfly. I get to pick THREE winners when I close the giveaway ohttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifn Sunday, November 6th, so head over to THIS POST to enter. All you have to do is follow this blog and tell me which of Shutterfly's cards you'd choose if you won!
If you'd have asked me this a few years ago -- before I had kids -- I would have told you it's never too early to start celebrating and preparing for Christmas. I was all for decking the halls instead of carving pumpkins, and had no problem listening to holiday music in October. But these days? Well, not so much.
Part of it is that with children, each holiday is special. Halloween means a preschool costume parade and playing pin-the-toilet-paper-on-the-mummy; it means trick-or-treating with friends and lots of candy (which I'll ultimately steal from her snack bag!). Then there's Thanksgiving and all the yummy food and football, time spent with family and friends who feel like family.
Skipping right from the tail-end of summer to Christmas also means bypassing fall. I'd never get to enjoy the smell of crisp autumn air, or watch G jump into piles of leaves quicker than her daddy and I can rake them. It would mean missing out on hot apple cider and cool nights perfect for roasting marshmallows by our backyard fire pit.
If I started busting out the wrapping paper on November first, I'd have to put up with G asking me how much longer til she gets to open those gifts for almost two months. If I started humming Jingle Bells before Thanksgiving, I'd never get to teach my children my family's favorite song about turkeys (yes, my family does have a favorite song about turkeys! We also like to sing a song about the Titanic, don't ask me why).
If we took G and C to the mall to see Santa in mid-November, it wouldn't be as special when he arrived in Herald Square at the very end of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
So, while I might not be able to avoid preparing for Christmas this time of year (and that includes getting my holiday cards finished -- so don't forget to enter my giveaway for a set of 25 free photo cards compliments of Shutterfly!!!), I won't start celebrating it until after Thanksgiving.
