This is a post I'd hoped never to write, because to me, it symbolizes--in a way--my failure as a mother.
When I was in high school, I dreamed about my college days. In college, I dreamed about what my career would be like. When I was working, I dreamed about a life as a stay at home mom. Never--or to be fair to myself, rarely--did I stop to "smell the roses," so to speak. I had a hard time pausing wherever I currently was in life to appreciate the world around me: to take it all in, to thank God for what he had given me in the here and now, rather than days, months, or even years down the road.
I have been working to slow down and enjoy today recently, but apparently, I haven't been working hard enough.
Last night, on the way home from the grocery store, G and I drove through some neighborhoods looking for what she calls "Halloween stuff"--be it pumpkins, orange lights, or ghosts hanging from the trees (if this is a foreshadowing of the Christmas season, I'm going to be logging a lot of miles in the car, scouting out decorations!). Literally the minute we passed one house, G would say, "I don't see more Halloween stuff!" and proceed to pout until we came upon another festively decorated house.
After a few minutes, I pulled over to the curb, turned on my hazards, and looked at her in the rearview mirror. Then I told her, "G, just appreciate the decorations you have seen; don't worry about what's coming next."
I was crushed. I've never liked my focus on the future. I've realized over the years that I haven't been present in what's currently going on around me, and as a result, I've missed out on truly living some of my best moments to the fullest. I hoped it's something I wouldn't pass on to G, but whether by my actions, feelings, or pure genetics, I have.
Oh, dear ... this is the EXACT trait I don't want N to inherit from ME. We are too similar, my friend. I am on the go, go, go too much and forget to relax, rejuvenate, breathe, etc. So, I'm right there with ya.
oooh, that's a good one. I can totally relate and my S.O. is constantly telling me to quit worrying about the future and to enjoy the now.
I will try to 'appetite' today, especially since it's Friday!
That's an interesting question. Like you, I've been trying really hard to live in the now and not be waiting for or looking forward to what's coming next. Some days it's really easy to do, other days not so much.
I think, aside from that, that I really hope Charlie grows up to be more socially confident than I am. I want him to not be afraid to meet new people and have the courage to just go up to someone he doesn't know and introduce himself. I want him to be able to go to a party where he only knows one person and not stand awkwardly against the wall feeling sorry for himself. I've struggled with social situations all my life, and I hope he has an easier time of it.
My son is "zoning" out these days, which is what I do...it's a horrible trait and after 10 times saying "Cole" I get a huh?
I do that too..
I really dont want my kids picking up my temper, and my negative attitude. I do want them to pick up how much of a loving man I am, most of all my boys, I want them to see its ok to be a sensitive male.
And I really think the worst trait you could pass on to G would be becoming a Blue Devil. Even though they are pre season number 1
I can definitely relate. But...I think my biggest bad habit is worrying too much. I've struggled a lot with anxiety-- more than ever in my life once Cate was born. A lot of it stemming from a need to seem "perfect." But I can remember sleepless nights in elementary school before big tests and projects too. I hope Cate is better at sleeping easy and not worrying when it comes to that stuff. I want her to be prepared and all, but not up all night with a stomachache because she's worried about somethings.
This is one... Another is my need to worry & stress over every.little.thing.
Wait until she tells you she "can't like" something you made solely because you though she'd eat it.
I think that is more the age than anything - at this age they are just selfish and want more more more! But as far as traits go, my daughter got my OCD...about having everything a certain way...it drives me nuts but its just like ME!
Hello Stranger! how did I stop visiting you? Bloggin can do that to a girl... you just get sucked into whatever is in front of you!! *ahem*
Christina is right... a lot of that is the stage... I have realized over the years to not take my parenting so personal and to realize that we are in training "training" them to be amazing little people! it is constant ... teaching, guiding, setting examples, etc. etc. so though it is good to remember to slow down and smell the roses... don't be too hard on yourself... the constant "training" will get more intense as she grows! and your patience will find ways to grow as you figure out how to train her every step of her changing ways! =)
I'm sorry :-( All too often I definitely share this same trait with you, and like you, I hate it too. I also hope not to pass on my feelings that no matter what I do, it'll never be good or perfect enough in my parents' eyes. Gosh I hope and pray I don't make my child ever feel the way I constantly do.