Last week, my mom-- a pre-K thru 3rd grade autism inclusion teacher-- had to attend an inservice for work.
They didn't discuss IEPs...
They didn't discuss curriculum...
They discussed "The Man Rules".
You heard me right.
The Man Rules.
When the lecturer for this inservice (a well-known child psychologist from The Cleveland Clinic) walked into the room to instruct my mom and about 2 dozen other educators, he wrote this phrase on the board:
Yes, this is apparently the #1 skill elementary school students-- particularly those with special needs-- need to be taught in the school district where
The lecturer posed this question to the room: "If there are five urinals, and a man is already standing at 5, where do you go?"My mom looked around at the other female teachers, not knowing what to say. If you're a woman, you've probably entered said bathroom in a pack of 5, and everyone will chat while they do their business. It's just how we women operate.
Finally, one of the three men in the room raised his hand. "The first urinal," he said. And, said the lecturer, he was right. But what about if urinal 1 and urinal 5 are already being used?
"Number 3," another one of the guys answered. Right again.
But what if 1, 3, and 5 are already occupied? Which urinal do you go to then? 2? 4?
NEITHER! According to this Ph.D. level lecturer (and the three other men in the room), you NEVER use a urinal when the two on either side of it are already being used. Then, you go into the stall.
Say what???
This made no sense to me, or to my mother. Why not just use the open urinal? It was a question we tried to dissect on our own, but eventually, we needed to turn to our resident "Man Rules" expert: our husbands.My father-- sage man that he is-- refused to answer the question. He broke the top "Woman Rule" and stopped talking to her, retreating in silence to his man cave. My dad, it appears, does not
DH, however, was more than happy to entertain my little question. He couldn't really explain to me WHY he adheres to this rule ("I just do, ok?"), but he did add to it, telling me that in the gym locker room, you also don't use a shower if the one immediately across from it already occupied. ("You've got to respect a guy's privacy, that's all," is what he said.)
I don't get it... why do men have urinals in the first place if they want privacy to pee? Why not just have all stalls, like in the women's restroom? I'm still trying to process it in my head.
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Haha, I swear there used to be a java game based on the man rules...but yea, boys are weird and don't like their junk hangin in front of others' junk. go figure. I'm a fan of girl bathrooms :) good thing I'm a girl, haha
gah that makes me angry and i'm not even sure why lol!
and does my husband have any of his own rules: too many to list.
i like to periodically kick him in the junk to keep him in line though. it's the element of surprise that shows him who's boss. have never lost a fight in our household since...
LOL - men... roll my eyes! I totally don't get the urinal thing - seriously... why not just have a couple stalls???
And how is it that they go from boys who will whip it out and pee anywhere with anyone around to this?
I have heard about urinal etiquette before too! Sometimes Jason will come out of a public restroom grumbling and when I ask why, he says something to the extent of, "some guy stood right next to me and peed and there were 4 other urinals open!" I find it so funny! I like how you called it the "man rules". It is so true. All men seem to follow them and when one doesn't it is such a big deal!
It's homophobia. They are afraid if they stand next to another man to pee the man will think they are gay and checking out their junk!
it's because there is never a line for the men's room and they didn't bear children which disabled their ability to hold urine longer than 5 minutes at a stretch
so, they can be picky
We were laying down tile in our sunroom last year. Across the street we heard one of our neighbors using a wet tile saw. Sunshine went to ask if we could use it since we weredoing ours manually but came back empty handed. When I asked him about it he said,"It's not his saw. It belongs to a friend of his." When I asked the obvious: "SO?" I was told that "Thou shall not let any other man borrow the tools that were lent to you..." It did not make any sense, but he refused to even take some tiles to get cut over there because of the "Rule".
This is what the inservice was about? I never thought it was that big a deal. But I do not have to penis so I really don't know.
Leland doesn't care and will pee anywhere, but I know he tries to abide by the rules to make other men feel more comfortable.
I'm going to be on a commenting hiatus as well starting on Wed. I just didn't want you to think I wasn't commenting because you weren't!
You will never understand us. Same way that we will never understand why women have to go into the bathroom like a pack of wolves. Same reason why women can toss around tampoms like a piece of gum. For me, seriously I just dont care. Guess cause I am too much of a clown to give a shit. Come pee next to me, I am not pee pee shy.
really? I had no idea an so learned something today!
Man rules, haha! Ya know I always wondered about those stupid urinal things why not just have stalls only!
I am so asking my hubby today if he knows the rules...
Lmao!!! Man Rules.. thats just crazy.
I get it!... to an extent.
Once, I was the only girl in the ladies' room. I went to the LAST stall (there were six). Another lady walked in and goes into the stall right next to me!! WTF, lady? There are four other stalls that are farther away from me with my pants down.
That being said... why wouldn't you be able to use an open urinal? I get that you should be as far away as possible, but... Why even have five urinals? Why not have 3 spaced further apart? Or is it necessary to have that buffer zone?
Great post... I'll ask my bf about it this afternoon!
Several things come to mind, most of which I can't say becuase your blog is pretty G-rated. I will say I find this absolutely ridiculous and innapropriate in a school setting or, really, anywhere. Second, some psycholgist makes a wholte ton of $$ to talk about crap like this? As if it matters? Geez, I am in the wrong profession. Third...well. Never mind. Suffice it to say I find the whole idea terrible.
haha I'm going to ask Hubs & see what he says...I'll def be leaving a follow up comment! lol
My HB has too many weird man rule quirks to even try to figure it out but I agree build some stalls and get over it =)
I am certain urinals were probably invented by the guy with the biggest doodle and the biggest ego in a need to show the world his goods so he could feel better about other short comings in his life =)
I have to laugh at this because I use this very same example in my intro to sociology classes to explain how social norms operate. It's just so true!
okay...now THAT is funny!
I am dying to ask my husband now if he follows this "rule"? Like seriously? Women are far different than men. I have gone shopping with my friends and had to use the same dressing room. We're not shy. What's the big deal? Man rules..hhaaha
You know the really funny thing about this? Urinals were probably developed by men. The bathrooms were probably designed by men. Why on EARTH they were designed in such a way as to be a hindrance to the man rules makes no sense at ALL!!!
Second thought--at Wrigley Field (Chicago Cubs) there's literally a TROUGH in the men's room. And who desiged that? Probably a guy. Craziness.
This is my third time trying to answer your "man rules" question--each time I type something three men in black appear and erase my words.
Here is how they want me to respond: "I have no comment at this time."
OH wow....I'm at a loss that this is the information being discussed at these inservice training days (which I might add the kids are home from school for right?)
No wonder our education levels are among the lowest in developed countries...
Alex aka Ma What's For Dinner
www.mawhats4dinner.com
What does it say about me that I knew those answers and totally understand them? I need more estrogen in my house.
Men are so odd. I agree it's homophobia also - have we seriously not evolved past that yet?!
I'm not aware of any of D's man rules, except perhaps it's a 'rule' to drag his feet proposing? :)
I think men, having embraced the urinal, have kissed privacy goodbye. I find the whole concept of public bathrooms a horrifying, but unfortunately necessary, evil. Still, I try to pretend they don't exist and therefore have not given this issue a great deal of thought.
I've heard the urinal rule many, many times before.
Dh plays sports and refs, so he's let me in on many rules.
So funny! I've heard the "Choose a Urinal" story he told you and DH answered the same way the guys in your mom's lecture did.
What the....?
I didn't realize that there was such a strict set of rules for being a guy! I take back everything I ever said to my husband about how much he has it so much easier than I do. :)
Funny story though. A guy I work with took his recently potty trained son to a baseball game. No urinal. Just a trough. His son, being the new little man that he was pulled his pants all the way down to his ankles just like he did at home. His dad, my coworker, not wanting his son to be humiliated, did the same. Wow! Gutsy daddy move, but oh so cute. His son in 7 now so I guess he's now taught him the real man rules.
PS...I only know this story b/c he confessed it (well it was sort of tortured out of him) when he was three sheets to the wind at a work happy hour.
Hmmm, that is a strange one. I'm gonna ask my hubby about it later! I would also like to know about the "I don't clean bathrooms" or "I don't wash floors" rules that men seem to have!
I am so glad I am a female, although being male would be nice when taking long walks in the woods! LOL!
Oh come on, don't women have the same rules about bathroom stalls...?? No? Oh, well, me neither. lol
Haaaaa,
I thought my hubby was the only one who followed the man rules. I hear about all this whenever someone (especially his boss who will talk to him) stands next to him in the bathroom. I totally made him read this post ;-)
I have to say though, I **do** get it. Whenever I go to the womens' bathroom I always go to the stall furthest away. I am a private kind of person.
Just the other day I was explaining to some guy how the girls talking away in the bathroom was a myth (guess not). I have to be a **very** good friend with a girl to talk to her in the bathroom (or be drunk). It's just something about me I guess.
oh my goodness!! I can not believe they talked about that!!!
Men are a different breed for sure, but I can't think of any man rules off the top of my head... I'll let ya know if I come up with any ;)
LOL I'm still laughing at, "If you want to be cool, use your zipper to use your tool."
My hubby will laugh when I ask the question... and I'm sure I'll get a strange look as he wonders why the heck I'm asking.
I'm wondering if this was a class that was paid for. I'd be like REFUND all the way. Maybe guys don't use the stall in the event the other men would think they were always busy doing "other" business. LOL ?
Hubs has tried to explain this stuff to me and it's crazy. LOL
Man rules are crazy. If you ever manage to make any sense out of them, please share it with the rest of us. ;)
After 30 years of marriage I suspect that there are all sorts of Man Rules that I don't even begin to understand and probably never will! I also suspect that there a plethora of Female Rules that he can't comprehend!
Okay, so my husband says as far as urinals are concerned he will use whatever is open and space be damned. What bothers him is when short men use the tall urinal and he's forced to use the short urinal. Who even knew there were heights?
Hilarious. I had no idea, but I can't wait to ask my hubby. And the height thing is really weird too! Who knew!?
ohhhhh, stupid boys.
that's all i got.
:p
okay so i just read this to hubs...i asked him the questions first & then waited on his answers. he answered them verbatum to what you posted...omg! i had no idea these "rules" exsisted! ha he went into this long explanation why & so forth, but i just don't have the time to write all.the.friggin.words....oh men!
I did not know- will have to ask Aphrodite to ask Ares if this is true up there too ;-)
My husband and I have talked about this a lot.... and they have A LOT of "man rules." Like did you know that if two guys got tot he movies together there needs to be a seat between them? I know right, go figure? I guess we can see why getting "too close" to us can scare them. =)
I am familiar with this rule, and once I read a blog post by a WOMAN stating the rules of the game for when you go into a stall. They were much the same.
Men!
have a great week birthday girl <3
Did they offer a study guide?
I'm thinking I need to learn these, as I'm the one PTing J...
Especially, since he has no sense of privacy at the moment. Case in point - I shut the door on him, and he goes "Mommmmmmyyyy, what are you doing?"
WTH???? How in the world does this pertain to these kind of children?? That makes no sense to me to have an inservice about PEEING!?!?! What ever.
My hubby can't pee in public. He has a shy bladder!
Wow I can't believe your poor mom had to sit through all that! I am going to have to ask my husband about this though, he has never really mentioned it!
haha...! Man Rules~
I had no idea! I gotta ask my husband about this...which stall does he uses...mmm? I wonder.