Twas The Night Before Christmas  

'Twas The Night Before Christmas
...according to me...

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse...

...except for Mickey Mouse...
And Warehouse Mouse...
And all the other "mice"
my daughter loves to watch on TV!
(Of course G doesn't watch TV!)

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
(well, other than the ones the baby tore down and destroyed)
In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds (or cribs),
While visions of sugar plums (or animal crackers, aka "cookies") danced in their heads.

And I, in DH's ratty old t-shirt, and DH, in his ratty old boxer briefs,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap.

Problem #1: That doesn't rhyme.
Problem #2: Who can sleep with a toddler in the house?

When out on the lawn, there arose such a clatter,
I thought surely the Grinch had returned to steal the rest of our decorations.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Bumped my knee along the bedrail in the process and made a big CRASH!


The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,

Quit rolling your eyes,
I'm not writing another post
about boobs...

Gave a luster of mid-day to object below.

Well, that and the
1500 watt institutional-grade
street lights.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh...
And the cast of "Little People, Big World".
Does anybody else adore that show?
With a little old driver so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it most be Saint Nick.

Not to be confused with
my cousin Nick.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
(It actually sounded a lot like the time
we had birds flying into our laundry exhaust pipes!)
As I drew in my head was turning around,
Down with the chimney he came with a bound.

Actually, the chimney part would
be a problem in our house,
because it's a faux chimney.

His eyes, how they twinkled; his dimples, so merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry.
He had a broad face and a round little belly...

...that kind of reminded me
of DH before he lost 90 pounds...

He spoke not a word but went straight to his work,
And kind of reminded me of that self-centered guy I dated right before DH who was kind of a jerk.

And laying a finger along side of his nose...

...did G teach him how to pick it?

And giving a nod up the chimney he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

What does that even mean?
But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight...

Merry Christmas To All...
Thanks for visiting my site!